"WHAT?!"
"The potty is RAINING!!!"
From behind a closed bathroom door, our three year old little girl stood inside screeching. By the time I got there, water had started to come out from beneath the door.
Flinging it open, a rush of water came pouring from inside with Lauren Elizabeth jumping over me to get out. "WHAT HAPPENED?!" I screamed as I tried to get the toilet to stop. "I don't know..." I heard her little voice scream in horror as she ran away. She had been in there forever and I suddenly realized...she "really" had to go. Not only was the toilet pouring water out in abundance...you can use your imagination to figure out what else was coming with it.
Trying to stop myself from gagging, I reached around to the back of the commode to find the silver knobby thingy to shut the water supply off. I was covered. My feet, sweat pants, t-shirt...everything was soaked in poopy water. Even though I stopped the water at the source, it was still pouring over and covering the floor. The bathroom was flooded and the hall outside of the bathroom was beginning to flood too. I jumped up, pulled my pants up over my knees and hopped to the closet to get some old towels. Bringing them back, I was able to assess the situation in full. It was everywhere. EVERYWHERE.
Throwing the towels down to try and stop it from spreading, I ran to get some more. Eventually, everything was soaked up. I squatted down and completely lost it. I cried and went to put my face in my hands but then cried some more because they were covered in poopy water.
I got myself up, found a whole bottle of antibacterial floor cleaner and poured it on every square inch. I didn't dilute it...just poured it straight on the hard wood floor. At that point, I didn't even care. Getting new towels and wetting the floor down to clean everything up...it was about as good as it was going to get.
Gravity must have kicked in because the water went down in the toilet, so a few hours later, I was able to plunge everything out. Disgusting.
When all was said and done, I asked Lauren Elizabeth to show me how much toilet paper she had used. She began to wrap it around her little fist so much so, that it looked like she had a boxing glove on. "You can't do that, okay baby girl?" "Okay Mommy."
At the end of the day, when Adam came home from work, he walked in and said, "Wow...the house smells really good...it smells like lemons! What is that?" I shook my head and said, "You don't even want to know. How was your day?" He walked into the kitchen, tossing his keys on the counter and said, "Kind of crappy...how about yours?"
It surprises me to this day that he still gets confused when sometimes I can't stop laughing.